Turn My Swag On

If you can't tell by now I'm a big music fan. And this past Friday I treated myself to some live music at the Lyceum Dean here in Baton Rouge. As the band U4ria played Soulja Boys Swag On my girlfriend Germaine laughed because I knew every word to the song. "Girl, whatcha know about that youngster music?" My response was 'Swag On is one of my theme songs.' As I geared up to release my second book, waited by the mailbox for my divorce papers to arrive and kicked one dead head after the next to the curb and dealt with a boss that was over-the-edge, this was the song that got me moving in the mornings when I really wanted to curl back up and wish every problem would just go away instead.

After the performance on Friday I found myself walking around the house this weekend still singing the lyrics and that's when it hit me that before January of this year it had been a long time since I'd looked in the mirror and smiled at myself. If my memory serves me correctly; I would shy away from the image that I saw because it was depressing. I was wearing floppy clothes, my head was a hot mess and my eyes were always sad. I didn't care about my appearance because I had been told that no one would want me; a single, overweight mama with two mouths to feed. So I bought into the foolishness that my ex sold me, until I heard that song. Don't ask me why Soulja Boy was the chosen one to help me lift up my self-esteem, but his song did it.

I began to take an interest in my ever expanding waist line and decided to make good use of the gym that is located inside of my apartment complex. It was amazing to watch as my body molded itself back into a lovely size 8. Out went the granola clothes and in came the grown woman gear. Then I made a trip to Simply Elegant Hair Salon and smiled when Ms. Antoinette asked if I was ready to exhale and laughed as all the patrons gasped as I chopped all of that dead energy off of my head. And when the compliments started flying in from the opposite sex, I allowed myself to let go of my ex and the emotional scars that I'd carried for 10 years and move on with my life. It's amazing how one song can change how you view yourself. These days I'm still hopping up out the bed and turning my swag on, taking a look in the mirror and saying what's up girlfriend!